Beautiful –
What a ride this has been.
There have been twists and turns along the way that have felt so intense they made me doubt and question being here.
I’ve slammed the door on the whole thing, not just once, but twice.
Why? Let me explain.
When Tanya pulled out of the 50/50 agreement we had made, it hurt.
Our trust had been broken.
Suddenly, my neuroception went wild.
Lots of things I’d ever noticed or experienced in Tanya started turning into reasons why I shouldn’t trust her.
And it wasn’t just me; I could feel the ripple of that same pain in the community of women within Sistership Circle.
I felt the separation.
How could I move forward with a woman who seemed to take only for herself?
How could I trust that she was truly standing for the mission and the vision that had always lived in my heart?
Over the last few years, as I’ve come more into my own power and wholeness, I’ve realised just how much of my love, time, and energy I’ve given to Sistership Circle — which meant I had less to give to my own dreams and visions.
What about those?
Then, after talking to a friend, it hit me again.
This was the mother wound speaking.
The whole situation mirrored my childhood.
I was ten when my mother had her breakdown.
Witnessing Tanya in her own collapse brought all that back.
After my mum’s breakdown, she kept me close, like her little pet.
I learned to sacrifice my needs to meet hers, to stabilize her, to keep her happy.
That’s what enmeshment trauma does; it blurs the line between love and survival.
The child loses her separateness, her sense of self.
And suddenly I could see it.
Was I doing it again?
Was I being asked to fulfill Tanya’s needs at the expense of my own?
To give to her business instead of nurturing my own?
“Absolutely fucking no way will I allow this pattern to repeat,” I said to Peta and Tanya.
I questioned everything.
Where this partnership was coming from,
whether it was being built on survival or alignment,
scarcity or abundance knowing that the frequency of our choices determines everything.
So my first time pulling out was clear. It was a line in the sand.
I am NOT repeating the patterns of my childhood.
I am NOT perpetuating the mother wound.
I am NOT fawning or playing the good girl anymore.
I am putting myself first.
And just as this was happening, in perfect divine orchestration and humour, it was my turn to lead our Feminine Freedom Method group on — guess what — the topic of merging, fawning, and enmeshment trauma.
Talk about alignment.
So I shared everything and told Tanya and Peta I was out.
They met me with nothing but love and understanding. I felt seen. Valued.
When my emotional wave completed, I saw more clearly.
Tanya’s ego death and breakdown had been necessary for what is emerging.
This whole experience became a sacred opportunity to complete our old stories and come into right relationship with the feminine.
And I want to say this clearly — Tanya is NOT the villain in this story.
She is one of the most devoted women I know.
Her heart beats for this mission, for the women we serve, and for the healing of the feminine as much as mine does.
All three of us have had our moments in the fire, meeting the parts of ourselves that still grasp for control, that still protect, that still fear being misunderstood.
This is what it means to be human. This is what it means to be devotedtoevolution.
Through it all, I’ve felt deep compassion for the parts of her — and the parts of me — the parts of all of us that are still learning how to love and connect in cleaner, truer ways.
Because this path isn’t about perfection, it’s about practice.
It’s a continual remembering of who we are beneath the wounds, the stories, and the survival strategies.
Forgiveness has been my greatest teacher.
Compassion, my ally.
It softens the edges, opens the heart, and lets grace back in — for me, for her, for all of us walking this path of remembrance together.
And part of that right relationship, for me, has been remembering that I matter too.
My vision matters.
My work matters.
And so does this shared mission — Sistership Circle, Tanya, Peta, and every woman who’s been walking this path beside us.
I no longer have to choose between my soul’s mission and the mission we share.
Both are sacred,
both are alive,
both are part of the same divine unfolding.
This is what real collaboration feels like — not self-sacrifice, but shared devotion to the greater whole.
In my truth telling, I shared how integrity is something really important to me, and how I’d witnessed a lack of it within Sistership Circle.
It looked beautiful on the front end, but behind the scenes, it had been messy.
I know many in our community had felt that, and I didn’t like it.
For those who know me, you know how much this work means to me — the healing of the feminine and the restoration of integrity.
Speaking this truth out loud allowed for clearing, cleansing, and healing in the field.
And it created the space for me to come back in, because I was met in it — with love, accountability, and understanding.
But then it got intense again — so intense that it consumed ALL my time and energy.
Being in a triad of three conscious women means nothing goes unspoken, no shadow unchecked, no stone unturned.
It demands time, presence, and radical honesty.
It asks each of us to stand for ourselves, for sisterhood, and for the shared vision we’re holding.
It has been A LOT.
And yet, through the fire, something deeper was being revealed.
This wasn’t just about me, Tanya, or Peta. It was about the collective wound around belonging and significance.
For years I’ve prided myself on being independent, capable, self-responsible.
But beneath that was a part of me that longed for a true village — one where women meet and hold one another through the mess, not just the magic.
Then Peta shared that line that pierced through everything:
“Everyone wants a village, but no one wants to be a villager.”
That was me.
I wanted the village, but I wasn’t willing to tend the fire.
It felt safer to be on my own.
Yet the ancient within me not only aches for the village, but knows it.
True community is built, not found.
It’s forged in the uncomfortable moments,
in the conversations that stretch us,
in the willingness to stay when it would be easier to leave.
The overwhelm I felt wasn’t wrong — it was the death cry of the lone wolf, the end of the part of me that thought I had to do it all alone.
I’ve learned to hold myself like no other.
Healing isn’t a one-and-done moment; it’s a devotion.
It asks you to show up again and again — to meet what hurts, to stay when it would be easier to run, to keep choosing wholeness and sacred union with yourself, within the divine and with others.
It takes courage to keep opening when life invites you deeper, but that’s where real transformation lives.
This season of co-creation is asking for ALL of it — everything we’ve learned about healing ourselves, about meeting and holding not only ourselves but one another, and about trusting in something greater.
It’s the next evolution of consciousness made real,
one conversation,
one repair,
one act of love at a time.
And then I was reminded of the song Metamorphosis by Metara HERE.
The lyrics feel like a mirror for what’s happening among us — the great shifting of cosmic wheels, not somewhere out there, but here, in us, in the way we keep choosing love in the middle of the mess.
Because this is what community truly is.
It isn’t the absence of chaos; it’s the decision to meet one another through it.
To stand for your sister when she forgets her power.
To be the one who keeps the fire burning when someone else needs to rest.
To remember that every healing, every rupture, every repair is part of the same re-formation of love on this planet.
We are the ones birthing the new;
not through perfection,
but through presence,
through honesty,
through the quiet devotion of showing up for ourselves and for one another again and again.
Every conversation, every rupture, every repair has become its own ceremony of evolution.
It’s as though, through all our individual paths, we’ve been quietly preparing for this exact convergence — each of us gathering the skills, the awareness, and the heart capacity to meet whatever arises with grace.
Together, we’ve created a space so charged with truth and transformation that it feels as if life itself is using us as vessels for what is ready to be born.
And so the second closing of the door was my full stop on the old timeline — the wounded feminine, the version of me who shrinks to stay safe.
That story ends here. The chapter is complete.
A chapter of the feminine is ready to be written.
Which is why I am full bodied yes to what is emerging.
It’s my soul yes for being here. Just as I know you have your soul yes for being here too.
So for now, I am delighted to pass the baton back to Tanya for the grand reveal of what we’ve been co-creating together.
With love,
Sharlene
P.S. We’re standing at the threshold of something new — not just for us, but for every woman who’s been walking this path of remembrance. Tanya will share what’s been born through this co-creation, and I can’t wait for you to feel it.
P.P.S. Come join the convo in our FB Group here.
